In these late months I have been much afflicted with thoughts of the conversion of others and my responsibility/privilege of sharing. It seems a simple thought, but it has been one of much confusion and lack of clarity. Even now, as I sit in the local library, I hear another conversation passing by of disgust for "religions" and the pursuit of any of them. Fear and a lack of words so often keeps me from speaking boldly, or knowing when or HOW to speak boldly. In the last few months I have identified that some of the thoughts of "I should" have been ones attached to guilt and condemnation, and there has been great freedom in that.
Through different conversations, I seem to have gathered that it is first and foremost important to love the LORD, then comes the love of others and a desire to see them love Him too. (Comments? Im looking for some feedback) Which brings me to a humbling place of realizing, I dont love the LORD as I often think I do; Im not as far along as I often pridefully think I am.
This season has definitely been one of humility. Recognizing, it seems for the first time, ways in my walk with the LORD that are completely undeveloped.
Ive been reading this book called "A Lineage of Grace" by Francine Rivers which has been phenomenal. They are fictional stories based on the passages of Scripture about the most unlikely of people and how the LORD uses them for His glory. Tamar. Rahab. Ruth. Bathsheba. Mary.
A highly recommended read.
Through different conversations, I seem to have gathered that it is first and foremost important to love the LORD, then comes the love of others and a desire to see them love Him too. (Comments? Im looking for some feedback) Which brings me to a humbling place of realizing, I dont love the LORD as I often think I do; Im not as far along as I often pridefully think I am.
This season has definitely been one of humility. Recognizing, it seems for the first time, ways in my walk with the LORD that are completely undeveloped.
Ive been reading this book called "A Lineage of Grace" by Francine Rivers which has been phenomenal. They are fictional stories based on the passages of Scripture about the most unlikely of people and how the LORD uses them for His glory. Tamar. Rahab. Ruth. Bathsheba. Mary.
A highly recommended read.
Joyelle,
ReplyDeleteI love you. I love reading your thoughts. I've been thinking much of the same things lately about being a witness for Christ- I've felt sobered... hopeful... and excited at what God might do. I've found that the less I try to do the "good Christian things," and say the "good Christian lines... " (like "Oh that was such a blessing"... there, I said the word blessing, now they know I'm a Christian. :) the more I yearn to just walk by the Spirit and follow His leadings. Also, I find that I want to talk less and pray a lot more.
I really need your phone number. I desperately miss you and need a good chat. There's a lot to catch up on. I didn't know how to get a hold of you, so I thought I could try this route.
Love you much-
nome